Listen to your heart...

It's not that we've been fighting more than usual... We don't really fight to begin with, but after all these months we're starting to clash. I'm starting to see the side of his face rather than looking into his eyes. His smiles linger of resentment and it kills me inside when I know it's because of me.

Lately, I've been short with him. Whether it's not taking jokes as well as I used to, or just not returning the 'I love you' when I leave his place. He does so much for me and I think... I take it for granted. I even forgot to mention our anniversary this week...

I don't know what to do. I can't make a drastic change, but I don't want to make him unhappy.

I gotta fix us.

September 13th, 2006...

I can hardly believe it's been over a year now. I almost forgot the day completely.

I guess I've been busy enough to not let it catch up with me, but the longer I miss him, the more it pains me to remember.

Going to my grandmother's is strange now. I'm not used to missing his quiet presence on the chair close to the TV. For all those years I took it for granted, now I've lost him. It's just a strange feeling, I guess.

I love you, Pappy. Wish you could see me now. :)

Who's Afraid Of Google? A Review An Article From The Economist.

"Speaking for many, John Battelle, the author of a book on Google and an early admirer, recently wrote on his blog that "I've found myself more and more wary" of Google "out of some primal, lizard-brain fear of giving too much control of my data to one source." *
Google itself has been genuinely taken aback by such sentiments. The Silicon Valley company, which trumpeted its corporate motto, "Don't be evil", before its stockmarket listing in 2004, considers itself a force for good in the world, even in defiance of commercial logic. Its founders, Larry Page and Sergey Brin, and Eric Schmidt, its chief executive, have said explicitly and repeatedly that their biggest motivation is not to maximise profits but improve the world.
Too many sermons
Such talk can make outsiders wince. Book and newspaper publishers, media companies such as Viacom, businesses which depend on Google's search rankings and a lengthening queue of others are tired of moralising sermons.** Some feel their own livelihoods are threatened and are suing Google.*** Even some employees (called "Googlers") or former employees ("Xooglers") are cynical. Google is "arrogant" because it feels "invincible", says a Xoogler who left to run a start-up firm.**** The internal attitude toward customers, rivals, and partners, is "you can't stop us" and "we will crush you", he says. That "kinder, gentler" image is "mythology" and, he reckons, Google gets away with it only because of its impressively high share price."*****

*Such lizard-brained fear comes from a lizard-brained understanding of reality. What it all boils down to is the trust agreement. YOU, the customer of Google's FREE and sometimes PROMINENTLY BETA services decided, likely fleetingly, to put your personal data on their servers. Deservingly, you would feel insecure if your decided trust was suddenly undecided. If you resolve to fear giving too much control of your data to one source, DON'T DO IT!

In defense, however, in no way are you putting all your eggs in one basket. The sheer magesty of Google is that it's reliable. Whether it's their felxible cloud of data and transfering and backups and networking, or their constant monitoring of everything their corporation RELIABLY offers, Google is not a single, unstable, wire-wrought basket of the world's eggs. Google is a system of billions of baskets linked together under tight-knit security and high-tech data transferring meshwork. To NOT trust a company that thrives on the slogan "Don't be evil" and still put your faith in the American government is laughable in the least.

**I just went over this shit in my managment class today! The moralising sermons keep people motivated. Who wants to work for a company that feels like they should be working the street corner? The success of a business is determined by the people, and if the people can CONSTRUCTIVELY take in all that is said in these "sermons", the motivation and fabrication of a great, upbeat company can take foot. All the negativity in the business world crowds the industries with depression, and people just envy and hate the fact that SOMEONE out there found a new method of business, and guess what, IT WORKS! Grow the hell up, people.

***I really don't think I need to reiterate this, but my readers will probably cease to gather the facts if I don't. A little copy/paste never hurt anyone. "What it all boils down to is the trust agreement. YOU, the customer of Google's FREE and sometimes PROMINENTLY BETA services decided, likely fleetingly, to put your personal data on their servers. ... If you resolve to fear giving too much control of your data to one source, DON'T DO IT!" How can you honestly sue the very company who is providing you with the very free service YOU, the user, agreed to? And only because you FEEL insecure? Get to know the company before you judge it. If you're putting your life on the internet, you rightfully deserve to be found, if you don't want to be found in their searches, ask to have the data removed. It's not taboo, people, it's practice. And NO ONE wants to see you naked. Really.

****Hahahaha! ... Oh wait, you're serious? ... Hahahahahah!

*****You're a Xoogler for a reason, apparently. Look, I can understand the lighthearted competitive nature inside a business, and with a business as extreme as Google, I can almost expect some extreme competition. But if you're leaking to the Economist what was said over lunch with your cubicle-mate and secretary about slogans for a water-balloon fight against Microsoft... The words "petty" and "ungrateful scum" come to mind.

The more I stand tall to defend Google, the more I realize that it's become more of a religion than just another company. I'd like to see some comments on this one. You know, some well-thought out ones would be nice. Come check out the September 1st-7th 2007 issue of The Economist at the library and tell me what you think.